


Coffee and Tea

by disgraceRavenclaw



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow & Related Fandoms
Genre: M/M, Metaphors, Questioning, Rivalry, just a lot of crushes and shit, no actual relationship stuff in here, this is just a silly short i thought of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:42:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24122314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/disgraceRavenclaw/pseuds/disgraceRavenclaw
Summary: Simon and Baz have a long chat about Coffee and Tea. It's enlightening for both of them.
Relationships: Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch & Simon Snow, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow, snowbaz implied but like pre ship
Comments: 10
Kudos: 48





	Coffee and Tea

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoy this! It's not long by any means, just a daydream I had that I quickly rushed to my laptop to get onto a document. I liked it when i was finished, so I posted it here in the hopes that y'all would like it as much as I did!

Baz looked at Simon's silhouette in the door. He'd just burst in, his face red and twisted into an angry glare, looking at Baz like he was a criminal. 

It was basically your average Tuesday afternoon in their shared dorm at the top of the tower.

Simon stormed over to Baz's bed, fists balled at his sides. Baz could feel Snow's magic firing off of him in deafening, smoky waves. It was suffocating. He looked up at Simon, closing the book in his hands with his thumb between the pages, as to keep his place. "Is there something you need, Snow?"

Simon exhaled strongly through his nose like a bull about to charge. "Agatha broke up with me."

Baz lifted one eyebrow, and opened his book again, ignoring Simon for show. "What a shocker."

"I _know_ you had something to do with it."

"And how did you get to that conclusion?"

"Because you hate me."

Baz sighed, shutting his book and placing it on the nightstand between their beds. "I'm not interested in sabotaging your personal life. I don't care who you're dating."

Simon slammed his hand on the nightstand, leaning closer to Baz. "I don't want to hear it, Baz! You're always trying to make my life a living hell, Why should I think there's a line you would stop at?!"

Baz looked up at Simon. If he weren't bearing his teeth at Baz like an angry dog, the proximity of their faces would almost carry some kind of sexual tension (actually, Baz wasn't entirely sure it _didn't_ ). "You're wrong, Simon. To nobody's surprise, of course." Baz stood from his bed to get away from Simon. Simon stayed hunched over, watching him. "Even if I wanted to break you two up - Which I don't, to clarify - I wouldn't have to do anything but sit and wait. Your relationship was... well, quite rocky from some of my sources."

"Your _sources?_ What sources?"

"Come on, Snow." Baz sneered at him. "You're the school celebrity. I have to _try_ to avoid hearsay."

After a moment of contemplation, Simon stood tall, less tense but still intimidating. "You needed us broken up. I know why."

"I can find far more fun was of messing with you than-"

"You want Agatha."

Baz choked on his own breath. He cleared his throat. "Ex-Excuse me?"

Simon took a step forward, swaying a little on his feet like he was ready to charge at any moment. "She snuck off to see you in the Wavering Wood. I saw it."

"If you think being alone with someone in the wavering wood constitutes a relationship, I have some bad news for you about what we are." Baz said it as a cutting remark, but he was nearly unable to keep his voice from wavering. _A man can dream,_ he thought.

"You two held hands!"

Baz stepped away from Simon. All this fighting gave him thoughts that were no good for his heart. "She held my hands. That doesn't mean anything about me. It just means your girlfriend - well, ex girlfriend..."

Simon growled. 

"... wanted to hold my hands. Which, let's be honest," Baz said as he pushed a lock of hair back and tilted his head, "is not surprising when one compares us two."

Baz held eye contact with Simon. He sputtered, holding up an accusing finger. His breathing became harsh, building until his threw his hands up and muttered some profanities. He turned around and marched out of the room, slamming the door behind him. 

Baz watched the doorway, listening to Simon's footsteps as he marched down the stairs. Then he sat back down on his bed, and picked up his book again.

* * *

Baz didn't see Simon again until a few days later. Simon didn't even come back to the dorm to sleep. It worried Baz a little bit, but Penelope didn't seem to be mourning, so he obviously wasn't dead. When he did return, it was much more peacefully. He didn't even speak with Baz at all, much less pick a fight or try to accuse him of anything. However, the silence came to be a bit concerning.

He didn't even throw an angry glance Baz's way. It felt more like he was brooding than just ignoring Baz out of annoyance. Most obviously, his magic was unusually... absent. It pissed Baz off even more than Simon being his usual obtrusive self would. 

Eventually, it got to be too much. 

Simon came into the dorm room, and fell face down onto his bed. Baz looked over at him. "Moping, are we?"

He didn't say anything. Baz was ready for him to start becoming aggressive at any moment. "I'll take that as a yes."

There was a muffled noise from Simon, who's face was pressed into his pillow. Baz lifted his head a little. "Could you speak up?"

Simon turned his face away from Baz. "Thinking," he huffed.

"About what?"

Simon didn't react. His chest rose and fell with his breath, and Baz waited patiently for an answer. Finally, Simon pushed himself up into a sitting position. "Alright," he began. "So there's... coffee."

"Coffee?" Baz asked quizically. Of course, Simon would be thinking about food.

"Coffee and tea," he continues. "And, um... So- So, guys drink coffee, most of the time, and girls-"

"That's a bit presumptive, isn't it?" 

Simon turned to look at Baz and glared a little. It was almost elating, Baz had missed Simon's angry face for a while. "Let me finish."

Baz nodded, signaling for Simon to continue. Simon held up one hand. "Guys mostly drink coffee, and girls drink tea. Mostly." He turned to Baz and nodded. "Do you... do you know where I'm going with this?"

"No, not at all."

Simon sighed. "Okay, whatever. Not important. So... Guys, Coffee, Girls, Tea. Here's the kicker, though-" Simon raised his other hand. "Some guys... drink tea. And some girls drink coffee."

Baz furrowed his eyebrows. "I'm not sure I follow."

"Just think about it."

Baz sat in silence, running it over in his mind. His eyes lit up after a moment in understanding. "Ah. Am I to assume we're talking about coffee and tea as guys and girls?"

"Yes, sure, exactly." 

"And you're equating drinking with-"

"Yeah, uh-huh, so..." Simon laced his fingers together. "I have a few questions."

Baz pursed his lips. "Isn't this the kind of thing you talk to a teacher about...?"

Simon ignored him. "So guys- say there's a guy... or, um, or a girl, who likes coffee. But- But, they also like tea. Is that... can you do that?"

"Yes, yes you can. Now I get a question."

Simon's eyebrows shot up. "Um, okay."

Baz leaned forward. "Not that I care, but why are you asking me this?"

Simon put his hands down, fingers still interlaced. "Because shut up."

Baz frowned. "Informative today, aren't we?"

"Now some people," Simon continued, "they don't drink coffee _or_ tea. Is that-"

"Yes."

Simon looked down at his feet which were dangling off of the bed. "Okay. Now... here's where it gets complicated." He holds up a hand. "Say there's a guy... who, like, you don't know if he drinks coffee or tea. You don't know for sure. You think, though... you think he, um. Enjoys a cup of tea every so often, you know?"

Baz sat very still. _Shit. Shit. Shit._ "Go on."

"How do you... How does one discreetly-"

_Tell him you're disgusted by him and would like a new roommate?_

"-let him know you aren't bothered by it?"

Baz stared at Simon for a moment. Simon was leaning forward, hands outstretched a little bit and eyebrow raised quizically. (That's a nice look for him.) Baz cleared his throat. "Well, um... I don't think there's much you can do until he tells you that he... um. Likes tea." It felt silly to use the metaphor Simon has set up, but it did make things easier.

"And what do I say when that happens?"

"You would tell him that you appreciate him being open with you about it, as uh... Many people don't like it when guys drink tea, so it can be scary to tell people that. You let him know you respect him, and that it doesn't change the way you view him."

Simon looks at Baz, and it's unlike any look he's ever given him. It's soft, and kind of understanding. Baz feels both welcomed and uncomfortable under his stare. "You have more questions, I take it."

"Yeah." Simon looks away again, and Baz can feel the weight leaving his shoulders. Simon nods. "Yeah, one more scenario. So... Say I like coffee."

"Alright."

"And i've only ever had this- this one cup of coffee. And it was pretty good, for the first bit." Simon held up his hand, miming the action of holding a mug. "But as it went on... I thought, well... Well, this isn't a very nice cup of coffee at all." As he continues to explain it, he seems to become genuinely upset. "But I told myself it was rude to put a cup of coffee down before you finished it, because someone- someone worked hard on that coffee. But you put the cup down, and suddenly you miss the coffee, but like- not the _coffee._ Just... holding something warm and having that. That beverage."

"I think i understand."

Simon held his hands together. "Does that... does it mean you don't actually like coffee all that much?"

Baz crossed his legs. "No, I wouldn't say so. There's lots of different kinds of coffee. Maybe that blend just wasn't for you. Maybe that's for someone else, or there's a better flavor out there for you."

Simon nodded, chewing on the edge of his lip. "Now, um... on the other half of this scenario, say I... Well, I don't like tea. I do like it, I mean- the way it, um... is, I guess, the way it looks, but I don't want to drink it. I never have." Simon licked his lips and looked down at the covers, pressing his hands into them. "But there's- well, there's just this... one. Not this one flavor, not this one kind of tea, just... this one cup. And it seems... good. Like maybe, maybe I would drink that tea if I got the chance. 

Baz's heart skipped a beat.

"Does that... does it mean anything? Is this just because I realized I didn't like that coffee, so I thought maybe giving the tea a chance would be a good idea? What if- What if I try the tea, and that doesn't work out either?"

Simon looked up at Baz, waiting for an answer. Baz opened his mouth looking for something to say, but his words were escaping him as quickly as he could find them. "You... well. That is difficult. I think... there would be nothing wrong with trying the tea. It would only uncover more information about what... er, what beverages you like. If it doesn't work out, then that's fine. At least you know you like coffee. You may find that you also like tea, and that you either never liked coffee, or you still like coffee." Baz risked a calm smile at Simon. "You could very well enjoy that tea. You might find that tea much more comforting than coffee. You won't know until you try."

Simon looked back at Baz. There was a ghost of a smile on his face for a moment before he began chewing at his lips again. He nodded, and got up from his bed. Neither of them said anything as Simon opened the door. He stopped in the doorway and looked back at Baz. "Thanks," he said, barely a whisper. "I'm... gonna go be alone for a bit."

Baz looked back at him. The image of his silhouette in the doorway was unusual, unlike any way he'd seen Simon before. Vulnerable, unsure of himself. Baz nodded. "You do that."

Simon held the stare a little longer, then turned and closed the door quietly behind him. Baz stared into the space where Simon was once standing, uncertain of what to do next.

Then, he decided to get up and see if the dining hall was serving any tea.

**Author's Note:**

> I have a question: Are you a coffee or tea person? Not with the metaphor in mind, the actual drinks. Personally, I don't like coffee OR tea when they're hot, but I can mind some tea and coffee cold. Mostly, i'm an energy drink kinda guy.


End file.
